We’ve all seen them, those clickbait links with the title that draws you in and JUST MAKES YOU WANT TO KNOW MORE.
But due to time constraints, self discipline, and general intelligence, many people usually avoid the sheer temptation of finding out what “weird food will help you lose belly fat,” which “female celebrity used to be a male,” and the “20 scandalous secrets about Friends that came out when the show ended.”
Today, however, I have sacrificed myself, going down a clickbait rabbit hole in an effort to satiate the curiosities of readers everywhere.
Boy did I learn a lot.
And so will you.
Okay, this is deceiving. To clarify, she WAS still having a baby. But it wasn’t just one, it was three. She was having triplets. I see what you did there, clickbait.
Wow. Add ice after boiling for ten minutes. Someone let me know if this actually works.
This person wrote an entire blog post on how much they love HelloFresh. By “Never Going Back” they meant “Never Going Back to Regular Cooking.”
I, again, can’t help but feel deceived.
I just watched a twenty minute video about Dr. Martin Goldstein discussing his credentials (he graduated number two in his veterinarian class in Cornell. He’s been on both Oprah and Martha Stewart. He also knows Jerry Seinfeld). Then he told me about all this stuff in dog food that’s not good for dog food. Finally I learned that the worst dog food to buy is “any dog food that’s not Dr. Marty Premium Dog Food.”
Which is $60 per bag.
Because it’s wildly misogynistic, obviously. Also apparently they’ve gotten sued a bunch because … you know, #TimesUp.
56 stupid slides later, was just an Arctic fox.
Planet Hollywood, Roy Rogers, Big Boy, TCBY, Rainforest Cafe, Quiznos, Blimpie (they’re still around?) and then a bunch of restaurants I’ve never heard of (like “Kenny Rogers Roasters” and “Dogs ‘n Suds”)
No explanation needed here, this dude is in fact huge!
Fruit juice (especially orange and apple), flavored yogurt, and vegetable oil.
“They’re probably gonna lie again.”
She stole the identity of a dead person before she met her husband. She bought that hat on her own though.
I don’t know which is a bigger crime.
No. This is another Dr. Marty video. I’m not doing this to myself again.
He used to be a crackhead, and he “used to have a bromance with Donald Trump.” Not sure if those two incidents coincided.
She felt calmer, happier, and less stressed, because this was an ad for CBD. If you’re wondering if she’ll keep using (relying on) CBD, her answer is “hell-to-the-yes.”
Pretty much anything on the menu, let’s be honest, but specifically the shamrock shake (which is like eating six slices of bread at once!!), the sausage breakfast sandwich (according to this article, “The aftermath ain’t pretty”), and soda (duh).
Scrambled eggs, Boca burgers, goldfish crackers, hummus and the occasional Chardonnay.
It’s almost like she a real person, just like you and me.
This literally just takes you straight to Macy’s website.
They built a new fire station in their town which made me feel a lot less emotional than I anticipated.
If it’s called “Golden Corral.”