What Should I Be For Halloween?

Well, Halloween is less than a week away, and I still don’t have a costume. I would really like to blame it on the fact that I just got home from spending two months in Europe, but…well, I’ve been back for almost four weeks.

Now that I have a job, and someone’s HBO GO account information, I no longer have time to go shopping for a costume. So I spent the afternoon putting together outfits out of the clothing and props that I already own.

If backpacking taught me anything, it was resourcefulness.

 

A Cowgirl
A Cowgirl

 

A Volunteer
A Volunteer

 

A Barista
A Barista

 

A White Girl in the Fall
A White Girl in the Fall

 

A German Girl
A German Girl

 

At the Gym!
At the Gym!

 

Someone Sleeping
Someone Sleeping

 

Someone Who Broke Their Foot at a Lesbian Bar
Someone Who Broke Their Foot at a Lesbian Bar

 

A College Student
A College Student

 

An Actual College Student
An Actual College Student

 

Beach Day
Beach Day

 

Someone Who Knows How to Cook
Someone Who Knows How to Cook

 

Someone Who Just Got Out of the Shower
Someone Who Just Got Out of the Shower

 

Pillow Fight
Pillow Fight

 

Sexy Pillow Fight
Sexy Pillow Fight

 

Someone Who Loves to Read!
Someone Who Loves to Read!

 

Naked
Naked

 

Fifty Shades of Brown
Fifty Shades of Brown

 

One Shade of Brown
One Shade of Brown

 

Oh No, It's Raining!
Oh No, It’s Raining!

 

Santa Claus
Santa Claus

The polls are now open.

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The Productivity of an Unemployed Twenty-Something

Well, I’m back in America. I left my job, apartment, family and friends to go on a nine week trek through seven foreign countries, and now I’m back.

The great thing about traveling through Europe for two months is that I got to travel through Europe for two months. The bad thing about traveling through Europe for two months is that I am now unemployed.

When I first came home to my unemployment, I felt optimistic about all of the things I could get done with this vast amount of free time. I mean…I literally had all the time in the world! (yes Mom and Dad, in between the extensive job-hunting.) There were things I could achieve that I was never able to before due to a previous 40-hour-each-week deterrent. I created a to-do list of prolific ways to fill my newfound free time, optimistic about the new life I was about to lead.

Things I was hoping to accomplish during all of this available time uninterrupted by a job:

– Vacuum my apartment
– Make my bed
– Reorganize my closet
– Donate my old clothes to Goodwill
– Do my laundry
– Uncover my hidden iron and de-wrinkle all of my clothes
– Google if “de-wrinkle” is even a word
– Wash the dishes that my roommate left me
– Meet my neighbors and maybe even bake them cookies
– Learn all of the words to “We Didn’t Start the Fire”
– Read the Lord of the Rings trilogy
– Decide who to vote for in the next election
– Or perhaps start my own campaign
– Relearn cursive
– Relearn the pythagorean theorem
– Complete P90X
– And then become a personal trainer
– Find a job
– Find a second job
– Learn how to play chess
– Figure out how to get Nickelback to stop making albums
– Start a community garden
– Identify all of the constellations
– Go on one of those raw juice detox cleanses
– Knit all of my Christmas gifts
– Learn how to knit
– Solve the hunger crisis
– Join the fight against Wall Street
– Invent a quieter vacuum cleaner
– Write a novel
– Plant a tree
– Learn yoga
– Obtain a boyfriend, marry him, and start a family
– Retire
– Adopt and train one of those puppies that becomes a seeing-eye dog
– Learn how to cook souffle
– Find a cure for cancer

What I have actually accomplished so far during all of this available time uninterrupted by a job:

– Watched reruns of Bob’s Burgers
– Went to happy hour
– At a bunch of fish tacos
– Watched Wanda Sykes’s standup special
– Washed my hair
– Saw a movie
– Ate chili that probably was at least six days expired
– Filled up the gas tank in my car
– Petted a dalmatian puppy outside of the grocery store
– Drank some water
– Mixed with hops, barley and yeast
– Went to Redbox
– Brushed my hair
– Wait, did I already say that?
– Oh, no. I said washed. Okay. Well I’ve done both.
– Scrambled some eggs
– Set my alarm for the next morning
– Went to Taco Bell
– Looked at the vacuum in my apartment and ALMOST contemplated using it
– Called my grandma
– Took a shower
– Made a sandwich
– Went to the gym (well, technically “walked by” it)
– Took a nap
– Then got a good night’s sleep

Hopefully the next two and a half weeks will be just as productive.